I was waiting for a bus the other day in London, however, there was a driverless delivery van in the way and it meant that the bus was unable to turn the corner. We all stood watching the stationary bus at an angle, waiting for the driver to return to move the van.
There was much teeth sucking and huffing from my fellow passengers, when a man from nearer the front of the queue marched towards the offending van.
I assumed it was to try and find the van driver to tell him he was blocking the way … but instead, he stood by the van and started berating the bus driver for the delay!
I’m not sure what he hoped to achieve but a group gathered near him and maybe attracted the van driver, because moments later the driver returned and the van was moved out of the way. The bus was able to turn the corner and drive to the bus stop with the soon to be passenger following still shouting at the driver about how late he would be.
As he got onto the bus he went upstairs and we set off.
Unfortunately, the bus had to take a detour because of roadworks so turned away from our final destination. That set the gentleman upstairs off and he stormed down to further complain to the driver.
It appeared his day was ruined and there was a sigh of relief as he finally left the bus at his destination.
We all went on with our day … unperturbed … but I’m pretty sure his day continued in a downward spiral.
How could his day have gone better? What might have happened if he had tried to solve the situation instead of adding to the troubles of the driver? What about if he had taken some deep breaths when he started to get angry?
If he had read the signage when he got on the bus rather than being totally engrossed in the annoyance that the bus was making him late; he would have known about the detour and his temper wouldn’t have risen when we took the “wrong” turn.
What I have noticed is that when you start to get angry it’s easy to allow the feelings to permeate everything. You stop noticing what else is going on around you, and everything that subsequently happens is tarnished by the anger.
A simple breathing technique or focussing on something that doesn’t add to the anger can quickly change your state. You may know our 7/11 breathing exercise or the beach relaxation technique, both of these work for me.
If you don’t handle anger well the important thing is to start focussing on something else.
Let me know how you handle those moments and I’ll add them to a future article.
